After losing to Auburn in stunning fashion, Les Miles was fired as coach of LSU. While the school has yet to name a permanent replacement, they have announced Alabama coach Nick Saban will have final approval.

“I just want to make sure he’s happy,” said LSU athletic director, Joe Avella. “Technically, the chancellor and I are hiring the coach. But c’mon, this is the SEC. We know who’s in charge.”

According to sources, Saban has communicated to LSU that the ideal candidate should be able to win most of his games, but never against Alabama. He’s looking for a coach who won’t stop fighting until LSU is once again the second best team in the country.


Avella has desperately been trying to schedule an in-person meeting with Saban, but has yet to succeed. “Every time we call his office we usually overhear him ask his assistant ‘can’t Kiffin handle this?’ And then sure enough, Kiffin shows up.”

“I know it’s not as exciting as meeting Coach Saban, but it’s pretty close!”

We can't play sports*, but we can make jokes about them!

*Two of our writers hit a home run** once
**It was in a video game.