In the wake of DeMarcus Cousins’ now-infamous “Lord Give Me Strength” tweet in reference to his team drafting an unknown European player, the Sacramento Kings have set up the two seven-footers on a playdate so they can better get to know each other.

“I’m taking them to McDonald’s, so they can eat food and go down the slide,” said team owner Vivek Ranadivé. “It’s tough to stay mad at someone when you’re in a ball pit after eating some fries.”


By the end of the playdate, team sources hope that Cousins and Papagiannis will have developed a strong bond enabling them to lead their team to upwards of 33 wins this season. Plus, Cousins basically has like every Xbox game and Papagiannis is going to need to familiarize himself with many of them if he has any hope of assimilating into American culture.

“No, I don’t like him, but I’m willing to give everyone a chance,” said Cousins. “However, if he continues to be Georgios Papagiannis, and not one of the many talented guards from top American schools that we could have drafted in that slot, this is not going to work.”

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