As the NFL Combine wore on, and players were run through the paces of various physical and mental examinations, one crucial element of NFL play eluded top prospect Joey Bosa out of The Ohio State University.

“Why are there so many hugs and kisses in your plays?” Bosa asked earnestly, drawing mild laughter from team executives who clearly assumed he was kidding. “In college, it was all about tackling, and I assumed the same would be true at the next level.”

Bosa went to ask if the “hugs and kisses” movement came out of the NFL’s increased safety precautions, that simply showing your opponent you care about him would henceforth serve as the equivalent of a defensive stop.

“And all these lines in the playbook — those represent where I can find the best hugs on the field,” Bosa stated with some certainty. “Awesome!”

We can't play sports*, but we can make jokes about them!

*Two of our writers hit a home run** once
**It was in a video game.