It’s been a long, long wait but last night it finally happened: the Pittsburgh Penguins ended their 7-year title drought and won the Stanley Cup.

Finally, I can die in peace.

This was a night many of us long suffering Penguins fans thought would never come. I have been waiting for my beloved Penguins to win the Cup for literally my entire life.

Nick Bonino's daughter, Maisie, wasn't even alive the last time  the Penguins won the Stanley Cup. (Getty)

Nick Bonino’s daughter, Maisie, wasn’t even alive the last time the Penguins won the Stanley Cup. (Getty)

The last time they won it was way back in 2009. I was just a baby and have no memory of it. Sometimes I ask my Dad what it was like to watch the Penguins hoist the Stanley cup over their shoulders. His stories sound like something from another era.

It’s been hard to wait. Real hard. How many times I’ve had to listen to the fourth and fifth graders crow about their memories of watching the Penguins win the Cup. And all I could do is smile and nod, because I had no such memory.

But now, after countless near misses and what seemed like an endless wait, we have our championship. You hear stories of elderly sports fans hanging on to see their team finally win a title and I can tell you these stories are 100% true. Now that the Penguins have ended their title drought, I’m ready for the Good Lord to take me because I’ve seen everything in this life that I wanted to see. The rest is gravy.

I’m the luckiest second grader alive.

We can't play sports*, but we can make jokes about them!

*Two of our writers hit a home run** once
**It was in a video game.